The Story Behind The Smiles

The smiles in this picture are not just about the joy and excitement of the day. This was a wedding that had 2 continents and many years of prayers, hopes, struggles and dreams behind it.

The groom is someone I have been proud to call my friend for many years. His story is amazing. A native of Burundi, he put his linguistic talents to use with the United Nations during some of the strife that was happening in his country. This made him a target of certain factions, and one day he was kidnapped, taken to a remote shack in the jungle and tortured. During a raid on the encampment, he managed to escape by crawling away and hiding in a ravine until he was rescued.

His hometown was no longer safe for him, so to protect himself and his family, he tried to move to another town. He was quickly found by the faction that was looking to recapture him, so he ended up having to flee. Two countries later he found himself in a refugee camp. This highly educated, multi-lingual man found himself sitting in a camp with no work, no opportunities, and at the mercy of the charity of others. An athlete runner, he spent his days running and praying and hoping. Years of waiting passed.

One day, he found himself on “the list” of potentially eligible immigrants and started the process of background checks and interviews. Because he had worked for the U.N., he was able to get processed through, and after many long nights of prayer and long days of waiting, he boarded a plane for the United States. As he was talking to other passengers, he found out that the “Washington” where he was going to live was not actually the city on the East Coast of the United States, it was the state in the Pacific Northwest.

My friend settled in Spokane. He got a job stocking shelves at Wal-Mart. He found a church to attend and started saving money and developing a new plan for his future. He began a career progression, teaching French, coaching track and field, and working for the same agency that resettled him and helps other refugees start over somewhere safe. I met him at a small group meeting for our church, and learned he wanted to become a public speaker. I immediately asked if I could be his coach, since I taught public speaking professionally and wanted to contribute in some small way to his journey.

We became friends. I learned that this beautiful man had incredible patience, thoughtfulness and humor, and he was simply a joy to be around. He gave a Tedx talk that can be found on You Tube, and I was just so proud of him! When I wrote my first book, I asked him to give me a brutally honest beta read and his pages and pages of notes and insights were incredibly helpful.

I remember all of our conversations, but one in particular really struck me yesterday as I sat in the church celebrating his wedding. That meeting a few years ago was a typical get-together, dinner at a local restaurant, catching up, encouraging each other. We were talking about the future, and he let his ever-optimistic mask slip for some honest talk about his worries. As an immigrant, on his own, no family around him, he was still, even after many years, having a hard time feeling like he “fit” anywhere. He wanted all the things the rest of us want, a career where he could have a positive impact on others, a wife, family. He just wasn’t seeing a clear path to how all this would come together and although it was something he prayed about, he was having a hard time patiently waiting for the answer. He was standing on faith, but we all know that sometimes that is tough to do. We talked about God’s perfect timing a lot that evening.

On a cloudy day in June, 2018, I had the honor of witnessing him take the oath to become a U.S. citizen.

At that point, he had not seen his family or visited their home in over 8 years. Now that he had his citizenship, he could begin to plan a trip to finally cross the ocean and go hug his brothers and sisters and parents.

Here we are 3 years later. My friend has met the woman he was waiting for. He asked her to marry him. She said yes. Finally, it is all coming together! His view of the path seems clear! And then….. COVID-19. Now what? More waiting?

Yesterday the wait was over. This man literally crawled through mud as bullets were flying, hid in a ravine, had someone help him cross two borders in Africa, languished in a camp, flew to a new country, stocked shelves at Wal-Mart, taught French to high school kids, and ran and ran and ran so many miles as he waited. Waited and hoped and prayed for years and years. Asked God to help him find where he belonged and give him a family to nurture and love. As I watched him exchange vows with his gorgeous bride, I was reminded that God is faithful, and sometimes we struggle to trust that He has something wonderful planned for us, if we can wait and trust his timing.

My friend never stopped believing. Never stopped praying. It was not an easy wait. It was lonely. There were times when he could have settled, he could have despaired, he could have become angry. He didn’t do those things, instead he remembered Jeremiah 29:11 the famous verse that says;

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

I am so encouraged by my friend. He inspires me to be persistent and patient, to trust in God, and to smile through it all. The smiles you see in his wedding photo proclaim that the wait is worth it!